


Let Me Do This for You (Scars Part Three)

by the_genderman



Series: The "oh god why"-verse [3]
Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Frottage, M/M, Making The Best of a Bad Situation, Not Canon Compliant, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, Post-Captain America: Civil War (Movie), Prostate Massage, working through past trauma
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-08
Updated: 2017-07-08
Packaged: 2018-11-29 11:03:15
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,836
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11439522
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/the_genderman/pseuds/the_genderman
Summary: I lost the source, but while researching for Scars, I did come across a thread on a message board (I think it was for men who had penile/testicular cancer-related issues) where post-amputation sex life was discussed. And that sometimes prostate fluid (at least, anatomically, I assume that's what it is) can be ejaculated during orgasm, so that made it in here.Originally posted on Tumblr June 2017, but written before I made my AO3 account.





	Let Me Do This for You (Scars Part Three)

“You want me to do what?” Bucky asked, his shirt halfway off.

“Dry-hump me,” Steve said, only blushing a little. “Except that, if it goes right, it won’t be dry on my end. Don’t tell me you never dry-humped anyone before.”

“No, actually, I never did. You know we never did, and do you really think I could’ve kept up my reputation with the girls if I’d done that? I was always the perfect gentleman,” Bucky replied. 

Steve snorted. “Perfect gentleman, my ass. _I_ remember what we got up to.”

“And who instigated most of it? Oh, that’s right, you,” Bucky said, pointing at Steve and pulling his shirt all the way off. “You’d run your mouth until I found something to put in it.” (Steve grinned but blushed even harder.) “And besides, that’s kind of an off-putting name. Dry-hump. Seriously.” 

“Fine, would you prefer if I asked you to grind your crotch against my dick until I come?” Steve asked.

“Yes, actually I would,” Bucky replied, starting on his pants.

“Alright then,” Steve said, smiling wickedly. “Bucky, would you do me the honor of grinding your crotch against my dick until I come?”

“Drama queen,” Bucky teased as he climbed onto the bed where Steve was already naked and waiting for him, hands folded demurely on his chest. He knelt over Steve on his hands and knees.

“Aw, you know you lo–mmf,” Steve teased back, but Bucky cut him off, dropping to his elbows and ducking his head, kissing him hard. Steve snaked one hand free to run it through Bucky’s hair.

“Ohhh, keep doing that,” Bucky groaned.

“Keep doing what, this?” Steve asked, all faux-innocence, now twining the fingers of both hands into Bucky’s hair, rubbing little circles against his scalp.

Bucky responded by insinuating a knee between Steve’s thighs, pushing them apart until he could fit both legs between Steve’s, gently lowering himself down until their bodies were touching from nose to toes. He felt Steve’s penis, full and hard, pinned between them. He kissed Steve again.

Bucky hitched his hips experimentally. Steve made an indistinct noise and gripped Bucky’s hair harder. Bucky tucked his face into the crook of Steve’s neck, feeling his pulse jump. He ground down again, rubbing his pubic hair, trimmed short on Steve’s suggestion, against Steve’s dick. Was it more of a scratch or a tickle? he wondered.

“You like that?” Bucky murmured.

Steve merely moaned in reply. Bucky grinned and kissed his jaw right below his ear. Steve untangled his fingers from Bucky’s hair and maneuvered them down to his shoulderblades, petting Bucky’s back as he rubbed against him. If the growing wet spot between them was any indication, Bucky thought he was doing a pretty good job. 

Shoving his right arm underneath Steve to better brace himself, Bucky lifted his left arm and squeezed it between their bodies, groping until his fingers reached Steve’s dick. The still-cool metal made Steve gasp and squirm. Bucky pushed his hand between Steve’s dick and lower abdomen, rubbing his thumb over the glans, slippery with precome. He kept thrusting. If the sensations he was getting from his hand were correct, it was more of a tickle than a scratch. Steve moaned again and dug his fingers into Bucky’s back. Steve _really_ liked it.

(Bucky liked it, too.)

“Oh fuck, oh fuck,” Steve panted. “Oh fuck, I’m so close. Don’t stop, please.”

“Don’t worry, Stevie. I won’t,” Bucky murmured, voice low in Steve’s ear. “I’m gonna make sure you get what you need.”

Steve almost keened as he came, spilling over Bucky’s fingers and between the closeness of their bodies. Steve panted. Bucky kissed him on the cheek and rolled over, breathing heavily himself.

Normally, this was where it ended. Steve would catch his breath. Bucky would take his fingers off of (or out of) Steve, get a washcloth to clean one or both of them up, and then they’d get back to life outside of sex. Bucky didn’t feel ‘done’ this time.

“Hey, Steve?” Bucky asked tentatively.

“Mmm, yeah?” Steve replied languidly.

“I think the hormone replacement _might_ just be working at full capacity now,” Bucky said, hoping Steve would get his drift.

“What do you mean?” Steve asked.

Of course he’d have to explain. Bucky sighed to himself and started over. “It seems that I can still get blue balls even without balls.”

Steve turned his head to look at Bucky, not saying anything.

“Yeah, surprise!” Bucky said sarcastically. “Apparently ‘horny’ is back in my body’s vocabulary, for better or worse.”

“‘For better or worse’?” Steve repeated. “This isn’t a good thing?”

“No, not really,” Bucky replied. “Obviously I can’t just grab my dick and jack off anymore. I mean, the root’s still in there, HYDRA didn’t do a precise surgical removal, but there’s enough scar tissue that I can’t feel much when I touch the remains. Which up until now, I’ve been grateful for. Have you ever had to catheterize yourself? Not fun. But that also means I don’t know how to make this feeling go away except wait and I don’t want to wait. I want to _do_ something about it.”

“You’ve still got your prostate, right?” Steve asked. “I’m kind of a fan of prostate stimulation.”

“Yeah, but I don’t know how I feel about being on the receiving end of a dick yet, even if it is attached to you,” Bucky said, a little uncomfortably.

“There’s other options, you know,” Steve said, rolling onto his side and lifting himself up on one elbow to look Bucky in the face. “You’re welcome to any of my toys. I’ve got a very nice, compact vibrator; not too big, if size is the problem.”

“Thanks but no thanks,” Bucky interrupted. “I’m glad you like ‘em, but I am not ready for any kind of penetrative toys. Too… medical.”

“Ok,” Steve said, moving on. “If you think you might be ok with manual prostate stimulation, I could attempt to finger you. Or if not, I could play with your nipples and see where that gets us. Or a scalp massage; you seemed to like that earlier.”

Bucky paused and considered. “I _did_ like you playing with my hair, but I dunno if that’ll be enough. I think I’d like to try letting you finger me,” he said.

Steve nodded and sat up. He brushed a hand lightly down Bucky’s stomach. “So how do you want to do this? You lying on top of me? Sitting in my lap? Something else?”

“I’ll try sitting in your lap, as long as we clean up first.”

“Won’t we just be getting messy again?”

“Your come is drying in my finger joints. _I’m_ cleaning up even if you’re not. And honestly, I don’t know. I don’t know if anything’s gonna come out, I haven’t really looked into how everything used to be or might still be connected down there. As soon as I figured out I could still take a mostly normal piss, I stopped trying to map things out. Tried not to think about it too much in the beginning because then I’d’ve had to come to terms with being a fuckin’ eunuch,” Bucky said, a tinge of bitterness entering his voice. He sat up and swung his legs over the side of the bed. “I’m going to the bathroom to clean up. You coming?”

Unsure of quite how to respond, Steve nodded and followed Bucky without speaking.

——

Steve wrung out the washcloth and hung it back in the shower. Bucky leaned against the sink, hands loosely gripping the rim, staring in the mirror and gnawing absentmindedly at his lip. The _want_ was still there, deep inside him, sitting like a hot coal in his gut. He drummed his fingers against the bowl of the sink for a moment and tentatively raised one leg, planting his foot on the counter. It wasn’t as uncomfortable of a position as he had expected it to be. Steve glanced over at him.

“Whatcha doing?”

“What if we did it in here?” Bucky suggested.

“You comfortable like that?” Steve asked, stepping up behind Bucky, looking at him in the mirror.

“I’m not _un_ comfortable,” Bucky shrugged. “And if we do it here, I can see both of us in the mirror. That should help.”

“Fair enough,” Steve said, ducking down to open the under-sink cabinet. He rummaged around for a few moments before popping back up with a small bottle of lube.

“If you can get me off, I won’t ask why you keep that in here,” Bucky teased, trying to keep his nerves down. 

Steve noticed. He kissed Bucky on the back of the neck. “I’ll be as gentle as I can, I promise.”

“I know you will. It’s just, I don’t have the easiest time letting myself be vulnerable, especially like this.”

“We don’t have to do this,” Steve said, resting his chin on Bucky’s shoulder and pressing his body against his back.

“Yes I do,” Bucky said, a finality in his voice.

“Alright. Lubing up,” Steve said. “It’s gonna be a little cold at first.”

Bucky inhaled deep, breathing out slowly and watching Steve in the mirror. He flinched slightly as Steve’s thumb pressed against his anus. Ok, yeah, a little cold. “Keep going,” he told Steve. Steve kept going, slowly working his thumb in. His other hand slid up Bucky’s side, slick fingers coming to rest on Bucky’s nipple, rubbing over it. 

“Good?” Steve asked.

“Not bad,” Bucky replied, breathing faster.

“It gets better,” Steve said, crooking his thumb and finding his target.

Bucky moaned, closing his eyes and bowing his head. This. This wasn’t bad. Steve continued stroking.

This was good. Very good, Bucky amended, raising his head again and looking at his reflection in the mirror. His face, neck, and chest were flushed. Steve’s eyes were closed, his breathing even on Bucky’s neck. He was concentrating, trying to make sure he didn’t mess this up.

“You’re doing great, Stevie,” Bucky managed to say, a shiver running down his spine as Steve pinched his nipple hard.

Steve kept rubbing, teasing Bucky’s prostate until he gave a shuddering gasp, tensing his stomach and clenching down on Steve’s thumb. Steve’s touch became more gentle, but he didn’t stop stroking until Bucky had ridden the orgasm out. He glanced down at an unexpected feeling of wetness. A slightly cloudy, clearish fluid, not quite semen, dripped from his urethra. He laughed. It seemed like such a small victory, but there it was.

“What’s so funny?” Steve asked, opening his eyes and pulling out.

“It’s not really funny, I don’t know why I’m laughing,” Bucky said, slowly lowering his leg back to the ground, laughs turning into hiccups. “But, I… I dunno. Maybe I ain’t as broken as I thought I was. I _came_. There is physical _evidence_ of it.”

Steve squeezed in next to Bucky to wash his hands, planting a quick kiss on his cheek. “I’m glad I could do this for you.”

**Author's Note:**

> I lost the source, but while researching for Scars, I did come across a thread on a message board (I think it was for men who had penile/testicular cancer-related issues) where post-amputation sex life was discussed. And that sometimes prostate fluid (at least, anatomically, I assume that's what it is) can be ejaculated during orgasm, so that made it in here.
> 
> Originally posted on Tumblr June 2017, but written before I made my AO3 account.


End file.
